Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Hopeful

This week brought some tough news from Alabama. Claire has joined Eliot in heaven. We ask you to please pray for the Cox family. We have developed a friendship with this couple and a love for their little girl that defies understanding. Feel free to encourage them as you have us.

Ginny and I have been slowly tiptoeing back into the world. Ginny has been enjoying making jewelry and planning shows. I have continued working and am looking at going back to school. Some exciting ways of sharing Eliot’s story have developed. We will share more as they come to fruition. Brainstorming is still underway in regards to what direction we should take to help others. We are both openly seeking whatever the Lord would have for us from this point onward.

I missed posting pictures of Eliot. So I did. Enjoy.

Recently my thoughts have turned to hope. Hope is that which empowers us to make it through a day. To get out of bed, to look past the behemoth that is the now. The question that has been pressed upon me as of late is this: for what do I hope?

I had hoped that Eliot would still be here. That God would do a miracle. That he would be the kid that filled the pages of medical journals. I hoped that we would be a family for longer. I hoped that he was present at my funeral- just as it should be with a father and son.

I make no apologies for those hopes. Naïve as they are, I know a God who could have fulfilled these hopes with a single touch. But, today, we linger in a world that was absent that touch. So what is the subject of my hope now?

I hope that God is who He says He is. I hope beyond hope that His word is true.

Actually, this was my hope all along. God has not failed. I believe that one day I will be released from this body, and be at His feet. The questions will be answered and I will wonder no longer. Ginny & I believe that while we’re still here on earth, that something is waiting to be done.

My hopes cannot thwart God’s plans. And I am learning that this is a good thing. May His will be done. For therein lies my hope.

Matt & Ginny Mooney

Here are some scriptures that we have held to recently:

Hab. 3:17,18
Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

II Cor. 1:3,4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.

Lam. 3:21-23
Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:
Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Happy Thanksgiving

Ginny & I have settled in after quite a bit of traveling. We visited New York City. We were able to create some great new memories and reminisce of past ones with our son. We took it all in: David Letterman, Mama Mia, and Ginny’s guided tours through the boroughs- until I was too sore to walk anymore. Being away and being together was good for us both. Ginny loves the city and I got to see her smile a little more often.

We then, through an incredible gift, were able to take six friends to the beach for a long weekend. This trip was a small thank you to a few close friends who we could never adequately thank. There was beach football, shopping, and a whole lot of sitting around. Any time with this group promised to be great, and it was.

With that said, one thing has become abundantly clear. We hurt. Whether in New York or home, busy or bored, together or alone. We miss him. There is a painful emptiness for which there is no cure. Our future hope has not dulled today’s pain.

Ginny and I, throughout this journey, have sought to be honest. We do not feel a responsibility to put a smiley face at the end of every account of pain. The fear of airing one’s true feelings, when dealing with pain, is a real one. For believers, we do not want to push others away by admitting our horrible thoughts and pain. However, anything else is hypocrisy. It is our belief that our God will be glorified through a truthful accounting of our experience. It will be ugly, and revealing as to our weakness. And this is precisely why we need Him.

I have feared this post. Fearful that I have nothing to say. I struggle to have a complete thought, for they are always being cut short with doubt. As I have fought with how I feel, I will tell of what I know. Throughout this time, I can say with full confidence that God has been present. He has not come with thunder & lightning as I had hoped for. He was not the healer that I had prayed for. However, He was ever lingering, always surprising. Making an appearance in the most unlikely manner at an improbable time. Then again, I guess that was the theme with Eliot.

Therefore, God was faithful- doing that which He promised. The word reminds us that He is able to do anything. But He is bound by very little. He will always love us and He will never leave us. He did not do all that I asked for. But He did all that He promised.

Thanks to all of you who have sent cards and prayed and encouraged us to continue to tell Eliot’s story. We are seeking ways to continue the impact of our little boy. Many things are in the discussion phase. Please know that you are a part of this story. If you feel so led, encourage someone to read the story or let us know if you have any ideas (matthewlyle@yahoo.com & ginny@virginiabead.com). We still love posts and more than anything, if Eliot’s story has meant something to you, please let us know. Thank you all for joining in on this journey.

The “eliot” necklace is now able to be ordered online (www.virginiabead.com). Again, $10 from each sale will be placed in a fund for something great. Details will come, as we are currently investigating how we can best continue Eliot’s impact.

May you hug those close to you all a little tighter this holiday.

Matt & Ginny Mooney

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Check back

We are currently traveling. Thank you all for your posts and cards and calls and everything.

Please check back within the week. We plan on an update & hope to pass on continued lessons.

Ginny and I have enjoyed our time together. We continue to hurt and hope.

Matt & Ginny Mooney

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

From here on...

Ginny and I have been spending much time together figuring out what "from here on" looks like. Obviously, it has been difficult. Lots of looking at pictures (and, trust me, we have plenty), crying, and acknowledging to the other the emptiness created by our son's passing.

Thanks to all of you who have let us know what Eliot's life means to you. We love hearing how his life has impacted others.

We will continue to post (Wednesdays are still typical) what we are experiencing and learning as lessons from Eliot have outlasted his life. We intend to do a few things that will allow his life to continue to affect others. We are primarily at the idea stage, but ask you to check in periodically and see what steps Eliot's life spurs on. Also, feel free to share Eliot's story with whomever you feel might need it. It is, somehow, still a story of inspiring hope and a good God.

We are late to head out the door as I type. We are taking a vacation in order to just get away together. We welcome your continued prayers as we walk through this stage of the journey.

____________________________________

The first idea to come to fruition is the following. Ginny has designed a necklace named, "eliot". For those of you who may not know, Ginny designs and sales jewelry (virginiabead.com). The design of this necklace is purposeful. Eighteen black beads and a single jade bead represents the unique creation that Eliot was to us. We hope to sale 1,000 of these necklaces. This is a lofty goal, so we'll take any help you can offer. The necklace will sale for $30 and 1/3 of each sale will go into a non-profit we have created. Quick math will tell you, we hope to raise $10,000 . We are still sifting through precisely how best to use the money. However, we will be sharing soon, and the ideas are good ones-dealing mostly with children. We will be selling the necklace online soon; however, if you know you would want one (or 10) just e-mail Ginny at ginny@virginiabead.com. It will be made in silver or gold.

eliot

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

99 Balloons

Celebration of a Life

Ginny and I, and many of our friends and family, gathered Monday to celebrate Eliot's life. It was perfect. Following a song entitled, "Everything's Alright", I struggled through the following:
____________________________________________________________

"'Everything’s Alright'…not your ordinary funeral song, and 'Don’t wear black' are not your ordinary funeral instructions. But Eliot was no ordinary boy. His life was extraordinary.

A dad speaking at his son’s funeral is probably a little strange as well. But Eliot’s is a story I must tell. Ginny and I have things to say, and I’m going to try to say them today. We also have a saying as of late which is “go ahead & cry. We do”
But, if at all possible, hold it in for the next couple of minutes, or I’ll probably lose it with you. I have a tag team partner on board so I can tap out at any moment. With that said, I apologize for reading. My communications teacher would be disappointed. But I am just gonna try to make it through.

I want to thank you all for being here today. Ginny & I wish we could personally sat down with each one of you and express how much your actions have made our burden lighter.
Thanks for making a call when it had to be awkward for you do so. Thanks for letters & birthday cards for Eliot. Thanks for feeding us, when food was the last thing on our mind. Thanks for surprise one month birthday parties & blog posts & law school softball tournaments for Eliot. Thank you- family- for your love and support. Thank you Josh, Becky, Heather & Paul for walking through this with us.

Thank you all for joining us today to celebrate the life of a special boy who impacted so many.

We view today as a celebration. We celebrate the greatest gift the Lord has ever given us. In Eliot, we enjoyed so much. We loved so much. We learned so much.

Although, Ginny and I had seats near the front of the class, you all joined in on the lessons & the classroom kept expanding to include people we had never even met. We all sat in awe as God, Himself, took a sick little boy and pulled back the veil to reveal lessons about Himself.

An underdeveloped lung. A heart with a hole in it. And DNA that placed faulty information into each and every cell of Eliot’s body - could not stop the living God from screaming of Himself through a child who never uttered a word. To an outsider it may seem nothing short of foolish to credit all this teaching to Eliot, but

I Corinthians says that…”the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”

It goes on to say that God’s wisdom is unlike ours and his tools are not what we would imagine. His tools are not the ones we would craft.

Not a pulpit. Not a slick presentation. Not a bestselling book. But a 6lb. boy with Trisomy 18. God found great pleasure to take a lowly thing in the eyes of the world and show Truth.

Every aspect of Eliot’s life was a paradox. Because I hate it when people use words that I do not understand- let me define.

A paradox is defined as
“a seemingly absurd or contradictory proposition that upon investigation proves to be true”

Truly, all of Christianity is a paradox. G.K. Chesterton writes that, “Christianity is a superhuman paradox whereby two opposite passions may blaze beside each other”.

Our God teaches us that:
To become greatest I must become least.
That as a believer, I have total freedom & yet strive not to sin.
And ultimately, that I find life - in none other than the death of man named Jesus.
Through Eliot we experienced the paradox of joy and pain ablaze side by side.

Truly, the Lord did not ask us to take a path which He had not already traveled on our behalf. Although we did not willingly give up Eliot , his life & death have given new meaning to the sacrifice the Father made when He gave His only Son unto death, that we could have life.

And so today, we celebrate. Eliot is well. And, although we miss him more than we can express, we are only separated from him by our time left on earth. We anxiously wait to join Him in worshiping the Lord.

So today we propose a new standard.
How do you measure a life? By years? By esteem? By productivity?

Eliot Hartman Mooney
99 days, 98 birthday parties (& today makes 99)
18 nurses
17, 557 visits to his website
0 minutes unattended

Although these statistics are fun. They all fall woefully short of a metric whereby to judge Eliot’s life. We propose that Eliot’s life be measured by impact.

Thus, truly his was a full life.

We encourage you today to not forget Eliot. To not forget whatever his sweet life taught you. Please go & do that which has been stirred in you through his life. And we look forward to hearing of the ripples he has made in eternity.

Finally, when you arrived you were handed a flower. We believe that Eliot’s life is best understood when pictured much like the flower you hold.

A flower is picked to be enjoyed. Sweet to smell & viewed by all.

When your flower was picked, a process began whereby the flower’s life will end. But this is not the way we view a flower. We just enjoy it. We take it in.

Thank you, Eliot. You were the joy of mine & your mom’s life."